Chuck Justice Facts

Wesker · Joined: 11 Dec 2006 Posts: 333 Location: Somewhere

Because I've had writers block lately and have had bull shite going on in my life, and don't feel like writing a full fledged story at the moment, it's time to rip off an internet meme.

It's time for Chuck Justice Facts.

I want to see if we can get this to 100.

I'll start off. Feel free to join in posting any real, fabricated, or flat out absurd bullshit facts that you want to. (Also feel free to guess which ones are real or fake that I post) Remember to number them though.

Here goes: (if you add to this, you can type in any format you want, just remember to number it, I'm only writing Chuck as I don't feel like typing out my whole name or alias)

1) Chuck stands at about 5"10. That's roughly 67 burgers stacked on top of one another.

2) Chuck once drank New York New York out of their entire supply of Stella Artois.

3) Chuck's record in actual fights in 1 win 0 losses.

4) The one win was a forfeit (Fear the power of Justice!)

5) Chuck once discovered the meaning of life in a waffle. Unfortunately, he forgot said meaning when he ate the waffle.

6) The best movie of all time according to Chuck is Tombstone. If you need to ask why, then you haven't seen the movie.

7) Chuck can grow over 50 variations of mustaches/beards

8 ) Chuck once tried to catch Man Bear Pig on Scream at 6 Flags. Sadly he was unsuccessful.

9) Chuck's name rhymes with Fuck

10) Should Chuck ever gains super powers and go rouge against the goverment, he's deathly allergic to a prescription medicine called Ceiclor

11) Chuck's favorite color is a medium ranged gray.

12) Chuck believes that the only good moose is a dead moose.

13) Chuck officially renamed the fabulous french toast platter at Denny's the Fabulous Freedom Toast Platter

14) Chuck enjoys the sound of rain; while wearing a hat and cane

15) Chuck's preferred method of execution is angry gorilla fight.

16) Capcom snuck into Chuck's room one night and stole his personality and face for Dead Rising 2. Chuck didn't sue cause they included a dead moose head as a weapon.

17) Chuck once had too much caffiene and came up with a buddy cop movie wear the cop's partner was going to be a cat. It was entitled Officer Whiskers.

18 ) Chuck once cursed himself to sleep.
_________________
"You're not the real Santa Claus!"

"Sure I am, wanna see my gun?"

Smee80 · Posted: Fri Jul 17, 2009 10:16 am Post subject:

6) True

7) True

9) True

10) True

12) GODDAMN TRUE!

16) True?

19) One of Chuck's greatest fears is seeing or being in a room with a moose eating walnuts.

20) Chuck discovered that those guns from Dune actually have three killing names, JA ZA!, MOA DEEB!, and BUBEH!

21) Chuck has discovered that only he can yell BUBEH at mooses and have them run away and die in fear....moose country here he comes!
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BUBEH! 3 Times a Day! To keep those Tax Dollar Stealing Mooses away that's what we saaaaaaay!
http://i77.photobucket.com/albums/j41/jc1_06/resident%20evil/WeskerVsChris.jpg

HUNK · Joined: 02 Dec 2006 Posts: 638 Location: San Diego

22) Chuck is deathly afraid of Japanese Chefs

23) Chuck is proud to be an American, but happy to bitch about it too (he would rather have been born in Ye Olde England, provided he was rich and had a monacle)

24) Chuck once tried to wear a monacle - it didn't end well

25) Chuck has been held at knife point and at gunpoint, but never both at the same time

26) Chuck once invented a PizzaTaco

27) Chuck drinks too much

28 ) Chuck likes to blow things out of proportion, but in a comical way and without the Estrogen

29) Chuck once punched a magician. That's right. A magician.
_________________
"There's a time to pray to the winds, and there's a time to go kick some ass."
--Gerard Butler

Vernedead · Posted: Fri Jul 17, 2009 4:36 pm Post subject:

Has Chuck ever hit a moose with a 1985 Ford Brono, and proceeded to exit the vehicle, and shoot the moose at pointblank range with a .45 1911?

I think everyone should do this just once...
_________________
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.

HUNK · Joined: 02 Dec 2006 Posts: 638 Location: San Diego

I doubt he has, but once he reads your post I know he'll want to.
_________________
"There's a time to pray to the winds, and there's a time to go kick some ass."
--Gerard Butler

Wesker · Joined: 11 Dec 2006 Posts: 333 Location: Somewhere

30) If Chuck were to die tomorrow his greatest regret would be not having hit a moose with a 1985 Ford Brono, and proceeding to exit the vehicle, and shoot the moose at pointblank range with a .45 1911
_________________
"You're not the real Santa Claus!"

"Sure I am, wanna see my gun?"

Vernedead · Posted: Fri Jul 17, 2009 11:52 pm Post subject:

I want to see what Chuck does in the presents of a camel spider.

FACT: a camel spider is neither camel. nor spider...
_________________
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.

Wesker · Joined: 11 Dec 2006 Posts: 333 Location: Somewhere

31) Chuck coughs up blood in the presence of a camel spider. (not from fear but from confusion over the name)

32) Chuck has ran with scissors

33) Chuck once made a list of a 100 random bullshit facts about himself

34) Chuck once saved Christmas by giving guns to an orphanage

35) Conversely, Chuck ruined Christmas by accidentally making Santa say his name backwards thus sending him back to the dimension known as Zirconoplexia from which he originally hailed.

36) Chuck once span around in a circle so many times that he got dizzy and fell down. Normally this wouldn't be much to write about except that when Chuck fell, he landed on the last remaining eggs of the Pohnpei Starling. When the mother bird flew over and attacked Chuck, he swatted it away which led it to fly into the course of an oncoming truck. Thus, making that species of birds extinct. To add to the genocide, the truck driver that hit the bird got startled and lost control of his vehicle and veered off the road, crashing into a cave containing the last few known New Zealand Greater Short-tailed Bats, thus killing off that species as well. Quite an eventful day in retrospect.

37) Chuck doesn't drink enough

38 ) Chuck once got a summer cold and got so pissed off that he went on to make the world's greatest list of expletives ever.

39) Assuming Chuck had been proficient with firearms back in 2003, Chuck could have killed Bill Gates. However, he didn't want to get blood on his new jacket, or his shoes, or pants, and then there is the whole criminal record thing.

40) While he came up with the word 'Bubeh,' Chuck did not come up with the currently accepted defenition of the word.

EDIT:

41) Chuck really hates it when he types an 8 follwed by a ) that it automatically becomes a sunglasses wearing, shit eating grin possessing, smiley face and then he has to go back and edit his writing.
_________________
"You're not the real Santa Claus!"

"Sure I am, wanna see my gun?"

crystanci · Posted: Mon Jul 20, 2009 11:48 am Post subject:

42) Chuck's nemesis is pink silly string.
_________________
Is the glass half full or empty? Well, I think that depends on the damn drink.
__________________________
Our imperfections make us perfect in the right eyes.

Wesker · Joined: 11 Dec 2006 Posts: 333 Location: Somewhere

^ that or greeting cards that have so much fucking glitter on them, that when you open the envelope a FUCK TON of glitter gets all over you.
_________________
"You're not the real Santa Claus!"

"Sure I am, wanna see my gun?"

Vernedead · Posted: Mon Jul 20, 2009 3:42 pm Post subject:

Simmaria · Joined: 18 Dec 2007 Posts: 147

43) Chuck Justice is the reason why we will never see another Earthbound game ever again.
_________________
On July 11 a creature was born, not of flesh...but of pure hatred.

Girls don't LIKE comic books. They don't like reading. They don't like thinking, they don't like fantasy, they don't like science fiction, they don't like YOU. - Anonymous

XenoZero · Joined: 17 Feb 2008 Posts: 119

Simmons I'd like to think i have a hand in that in well. My hate for Earthbond is at least equal to if not greater then Chucks.

Wesker · Joined: 11 Dec 2006 Posts: 333 Location: Somewhere

44) Chuck prefers his meat cooked rare. He needs to see the blood to know it's dead.
_________________
"You're not the real Santa Claus!"

"Sure I am, wanna see my gun?"

Smee80 · Posted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 7:52 am Post subject: